Chelsea-isms

I was accused recently of having a favorite child. A friend (who shall not be named) noticed that I tend to blog more about one particular child than the others. It is true that the suspected "favorite" is featured on my blog frequently, but I must emphatically state that this is not due to preference. Instead, it is because the age and character of said child provides me ample blogging material. Additionally, this child happens to be home with me during the day while the others are at school. Had the blogosphere been around when the others were three (oops, I gave it away), there would have been many humorous posts about them as well.

In response to this assumed favoritism, I am posting a Chelsea-Only blog (Carter-Only blog to follow). This one is dedicated to all the funny (and interesting) observations and comments Chelsea makes that keep us laughing -- and guessing.
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Chelsea's insight to politics:

Hillary Clinton was featured on the cover of a recent US News & World Report magazine. Carter picked up the magazine and asked me, "Why don't we like her?" Chelsea quickly responded, "Because she's a Democrap."

(While I don't affiliate myself with either political party because I think they are both corrupt, I am not necessarily a Hillary fan either. The assessment sticks.)

Chelsea's language control:

While I was driving the kids home from school, a left turner made a very dangerous turn in front of me, to which I responded, "Oh, that was stupid!" Chelsea quickly chimed in from the back seat, "What did you say? (Pause, sigh) Mother, I've already had to talk to Dad about using that word!"

Chelsea as informant:

I have on different occasions, heard all of the following during the drive home from school:

"Mom, can you believe some kids at school don't know how babies are made?"

"Mom, some kids in my class still think Santa is real!!"

"Mom, did you know so-and-so has one Mom, two Dads, and six Grandparents! Now that's lucky, her Christmas must be huge!"

When picking her up after school:

"Mom, why are you so late? It's so hot, kids could die out here!"

"Ok, just so you know for next time, I hate these pants, I will never wear them again, they are itchy and ugly and I have been waiting all day to tell you this."

On not wanting me to do her hair in the morning:

"You can go ahead and put it in a ponytail if you want. I'm just going to rip it out on the way to school."

"Hello! Please be aware of the tangles!"

On role models:

"Mom, who is the girl on Freaky Friday?"
"Lindsay Lohan?"
"Yeah! I want to be just like her when I grow up!"
"Uhm... (Redirect) Don't you want to be a mom like me?"
"No, you can't play the guitar."

And, her favorite subject, Bryce:

When cleaning spit up off Bryce, "I don't blame you, Bryce. I'd spit out anything that smelled like that."

"He's crying because he needs his Chelsea."